ONE OF MANY REASONS I AM GRATEFUL TO @bjnovak AND @mindy

  1. For giving me a reference point to describe my relationship with my ex boyfriend.
  2. Who I texted 56 times today.
  3. And emailed three times.
    Nothing that would make for a good screenshot.
  4. And tweeted at twice.
  5. And we are not kissing at all except everyone who met us after we broke up wants us to be kissing.
    Everyone who knew me while we were dating remembers how much it Did Not Work so they're not riding my ass about it.
  6. And who I now cohost a monthly comedy show with, in which I reference him in one of my jokes and actively try to get him dates.
  7. Our relationship is weird as hell.