+REPORT HERE FOR THE COMPLAINT DEPARTMENT+

I have a few of my own to start you off
  1. I don't know how to make those giant plus signs and I think it just means I'm not cool enough to be here.
    OH MAN I JUST CHEATED AND COPYPASTED WHAT'S UP ➕
  2. I'm moving tomorrow and I hate packing.
  3. Zach Woods is not my boyfriend.
  4. My wife's out of town. My younger daughters out of town. I'm now deep in that irrational lonely state where I don't want to go to sleep.
    Suggested by   @gwcoffey