WHY I SWIPED RIGHT

I recently reactivated my Tinder because I was on Valium and love disappointment.
  1. You have two huskies.
    I honestly do not care about any other part of your life, even though you refer to your cars as "your children". Let me hang with those dogs.
  2. Your profile is so outrageously terrible that I needed to see how bad your opening line would be.
    He was the perfect mix of pretentious and dim. His opener: "Your dreadful pretty clementine." We'll have a spring wedding.
  3. This picture
  4. Our mutual friend is really great.
  5. We've met a bunch of times and I want to see if you also swiped right.
  6. I find you attractive.
    The least common reason I swipe right tbh. Everyone is hideous.