"Am I Being a Dick?": A Survey
I just need to know if these things I've done in my life make me a dick or not. It's for my self-esteem.
- •Texting a guy I slept with to ask if he still remembers the song he played when he ate me out by a baseball field so I can put it on my playlist for the next time I get eaten out"Yeah I know I went ghost on you and just flaked on you basically everyday after we had sex, but like.... This is important to my sexual growth."
- •Not bothering to wear underwear the first time you hook up with someone, and when they ask, telling them "I knew we were gonna hook up so I didn't see the point in formalities."
- •Reminding my sister she almost flunked out of sixth grade this year when she tries to brag about beating me in mancala
- •Answering a phone call during sex... And holding a full conversation with my dad about how I'm eating healthy while my partner looks at me in disbeliefThis actually was done when I lost my virginity, so I really fucked up the mood.
- •Constantly calling Ariana Grande "Tatiana Venti"Or Ariadne Gonzo, or Alina Garbanzo, or My Demon-Possessed Princess.
- •Finding ways to use this picture in everyday conversation
- •Joining with any group of people singing the lyrics to a song passionately and ruining it with the chorus to "Crank Dat" by Soulja Boy
- •Putting a hairline crack into my favorite pizza shop's window by punching a girl's head into itShe hit me first. I apologized and they got it fixed for free.
- •Instead of telling my friend not to joke about killing herself, I did this:She's still alive and she appreciated it, but still...
- •Jumping in a wedding photoshoot in the middle of grand centralbut WHO THE FUCK WANTS TO GET MARRIED IN GRAND CENTRAL???
- •Selling "Yummy Earth" organic lollipops as edibles to two Puerto Rican dudes from the Bronx at Coney Island for $8 a popThey were gullible enough to believe my Facebook name was trap mouse and that these lollipops were actually edibles, but I DID tell them these lies...
- •Leaving my read receipts on; always reading my mom's texts, but rarely replyingShe calls me after sending a text anyway
- •Constantly signing my friends up for free 7-day passes to my favorite women's gym so I can use their pass to work out in a safe space for free