1. Going out with a fresh wisdom tooth extraction wound
    There's gauze still in my mouth and my face is still swollen
  2. Drinking on painkillers and antibiotics and blood thinners
    "One drink. Just one."
  3. Snapchatting my rugby coach from freshman year, who's now a DJ
    He got me to drink a whole handle of captain for my 18th birthday and I ended up blacked out on his kitchen floor licking at his crotch through his jeans because I've got a thing for rugby players and authority. So there's that... And he's a DJ.
  4. Not keeping my ass at home where I need to be, recovering and finding God.