Requested by Maya Kazan

Good Things to Do With a Knife

  1. Cutting loose threads
  2. Sharpening your eye pencil when a sharpener is nowhere to be found
    And it's always on the rare days I choose pencil.
  3. Maintaining social anxiety
    Provides you with a stimulating pastime in situations where you might feel uncomfortable. Open. Close. Open. Close. Rinse, repeat.
  4. Handling hangnails
    If you're handy enough. (Pun.)
  5. Package opening
  6. Shaving legs in a pinch
  7. Using as a makeshift screwdriver
  8. Proving your love to someone
    Giving them a knife. Whittling your initials into a tree. Playing with knives during intimate moments. Or, just straight up carving your name into your lover's chest so everyone knows who the fuck they're in love with.
  9. Distressing jeans
    If you're into that
  10. Blood oaths
    Sometimes handshakes don't do the job.
  11. Anything a pair of scissors could do, but cooler and sometimes more efficient
    Especially on the go, where you can't be assed to handle two blades attached by a hinge. You'd be surprised.
  12. Pretty badass accessory with any outfit
  13. Snipping off clothes in a sensual situation
    I wish I could show that one scene from tank girl, but... Kitschy films get no love on YouTube.
  14. Callus cutting
  15. Letting creeps know you're un-fuck-with-able