Things I've learned about white people
  1. White people loooooooooove black athletes.
  2. But only black BOY athletes. No girls.
    Don't ask me why. Actually, do ask me why. Discussions on misogynoir is my fuckin thing.
  3. White people shade is a lot harder to decipher because they're very careful to make sure you don't think they're being rude.
    They don't like making you angry, they just wanna make you feel invalidated.
  4. Everyone has gone to Spain for the summer. It's like their rite of passage.
    If you're Facebook friends with anyone who is of the wealthy white persuasion, you know what I mean.
  5. They WILL try to find a loophole to say the word "nigga"
    I had a bio teacher say "what's up my nickel?" to me every day for a month until another (white) student told him the joke was getting old.
  6. Don't swap lunches. Don't.
    I don't care how beautiful the packaging is or how expensive it is. Don't swap. Ever.
  7. If there's another black student, do NOT expect them to be your best friend on the sole premise that yall are both black
    Sometimes they hate you to prove to the white kids they're "different than the other black people". Sometimes they're cool and you guys can trade glances in Spanish class when everyone giggles after reading "negro" in a very gringo accent. It's a toss up.
  8. The marching bands are not poppin.
  9. No matter how long they've known you, they will always act surprised if you know all the words to a John Mayer or Sugarland song.
  10. They will act doubly surprised if you don't know all the words to every Biggie song ever made
  11. Two phrases that they don't understand are racist: "You're not even really black!" And "I'm blacker than you!"
  12. You will get called on/called out in class especially when you're not doing well. Keep a few smart responses in your back pocket.
    This goes for everybody, but there's an extra dash of snoot in your instructor's voice when they call on YOU.
  13. Yes, it is standard protocol for the person with whom you're hooking up to say "I've never been with a black (insert your gender) before..." And expect you to give some type of positive response.
    What kind of response, yet, I'm not sure.
  14. Even the super nice people will have you dealing with a lot of microaggressions.
    Actually, the super nice people are more likely to do it than anyone else.
  15. There's always a group that's super rude to you. And, yes it's because you're black. That's why. Your friends might not confirm this, but you're not crazy. That IS why. It's totally okay to cry about it.
  16. You do have to work so much harder and achieve so much more to be respected by your peers, and you might get lost in that.
    But you'll remember that you don't work for them. You work for yourself and your dreams only.
  17. You'll be surprised at how versatile you've become after living through that experience
    And it helps you from getting a culture shock later on in life when you're surrounded by people who just don't get it.