the inspiration behind this new playlist

it's a mess.
  1. yesterday i took the girl who's fucking the guy who i used to(/still do but really don't want to) fuck out on a date
    she flew in to see him from canada. we went to an art museum, where she kept trying to hold my hand and rest her head on me. we lied on the cushions in the italian renaissance and stared at the ceiling while i played carly rae jepsen. afterwards, we got wine drunk and dissociated together over a charcuterie board. whenever she was present, she looked at me with her eyes full of love. it annoyed me. it's complicated.
  2. i went over to this girl's apartment for dinner who is trying very hard to be my friend.
    she is lying about her age, and is always performing for me in a way that makes her other friends side-eye her as if they'd never met this side of her before. she also sent me a video of her fucking her ex-boyfriend while her current girlfriend was at a ModSun concert.
  3. i took two dudes who were trying to fuck me to the club where we always go.
    one of them was the guy my friends dubbed "the molly man", a 30-yr old IT dude who sold my friends molly and fucked one of my best friends. the other guy is some dude i just met, but whom the girl who wants to be my friend said has mediocre dick. he brought a bottle of jameson along, so he was cool with me.
  4. i ran into my friend who i kind of turned down for plans earlier in the night, then bought her (and her friends) shots.
    we drunkenly danced and hyped each other up. i kind of figured i was taking her home, but then i irish goodbye'd her and slipped out before it was too late.
  5. me and the two gentlemen then went to a late night italian spot, where we ate and continued to drink.
    i ordered more bubbles, molly man got an old fashioned, the other guy got another shot of jameson. after a while, he just slumped into his elbows while we ate, silent and supposedly sleeping. (i would like to note here that the other guy is mid-20s, older than i am) we paid for our food, then carried the other guy out. right as we reach the door, he vomits jameson and spaghetti.
  6. molly man and i tried to take jameson guy home.
    he was vomiting all over my car as molly man listened to me ramble about my relationship trauma and my current weird sex life situation.
  7. i got back to molly man's house and we talked about his ordeal with my best friend briefly before settling into bed.
    he asked to eat my pussy multiple times. i said i'm good. and i am. i guess?
  8. i woke up at 6:30 and take a tour of his rowhome
    it's beautiful, almost beautiful enough to make me want to fuck him just to kind of move in. but i don't. because he's the molly man, and he fucked my best friend.
  9. we tried to watch a bit of "Insecure" (shout out @IssaRae, you'll get on here soon) but i dipped out shortly, promising to meet him at the farmer's market later in the morning.
  10. and now i'm driving home, with no sign of a hangover, a weird feeling in my gut, a bottle of jameson in my purse and the taste of blood in my mouth.
  11. mouthblood.