Things That Inevitably Happen When You Go Out Alone
- •you will spill something on your shirtand spend the next three minutes at the bar looking like a doof wiping the stain
- •a song you love will come onand you'll sing along over-enthusiastically then have to quiet down because you're alone and nobody will join in, even though they'll smile at you like they know
- •your battery will run lowand if that's your only way to avoid looking alone and awkward, you'll be shit outta luck
- •you will eavesdropthen you'll get too invested in the conversation and react to something someone said and they'll notice you were listening in
- •someone will ask if you're okay/offer to buy a drinkand you'll reply awkwardly. this could go one of two ways.
- •there'll be another person sitting aloneyou'll make eye contact. maybe you spark a conversation. maybe you continue being alone. but the solidarity will be there.