CRAZY WORKPLACE GOSSIP I LEARNED THIS WEEKEND

This is a true story. At the request of the survivors, the names have been changed. Out of respect for the dead, the rest has been told exactly as it occurred.
  1. I recently got kinda tight with my one colleague Russell, who has a very colorful background.
    He dropped out of college after one year, toured with a band, got addicted to heroin, went through rehab, traveled South America and Asia, finished a degree in psychology, and then moved to Prague. All this before thirty. His hobby is growing marijuana in his flat.
  2. His best friend is Richard, our supervisor.
    He apparently does a lot of cocaine.
  3. Some time last year, Richard cheated on his girlfriend of two years, Celine, with her best friend, who happens to be a man.
    Also with two prostitutes, apparently, which is irrelevant to the story but ???
  4. They broke up, obviously, and it was pretty messy because they had a dog together.
  5. Anyway, in the fall, Celine's best girlfriend, Kačka, started working at our school.
  6. And at the first meeting of the Czech staff for the year, she said, "Why do you all like Richard so much, you know he's gay, right?"
  7. She quit/was fired (unclear) in February, but apparently until that day she was doing all she could to turn everyone against Richard, even though he is very good at his job.
    (Despite weekend drug use)
  8. At the end of telling this story, Russell says to me, "Oh yeah, and I guess I'm not blameless in all this because I fucked Kačka to shut her up."
    😱
  9. So yeah this has been another episode of "People in Prague are Fucking Wild."
    Alternate title: "White People Need to be Stopped"
  10. BONUS TIDBIT: Russell and Richard are currently dating Russian twins.
    I'll say it again--white people need to be stopped.