I just wrote this as a series of tweets but then I realized that was not the place for this and sheepishly deleted.
  1. I just woke up from a dream where I randomly got sent back in time to live with the first white European colonizers of North America.
    Like in Outlander.
  2. Only my phone still worked and I had amazing service so I could still text people from 2016 and use Google.
  3. So I knew all these special things and would be like "guys, it seems to me if we set up camp right here it will flood and we'll lose all our stuff, we should probably head up river a bit" and also "yo maybe let's not give the natives these syphilis blankets."
  4. I don't know how I was charging the thing though.