How to Tolerate the Intolerable
It's called Self Regulation. The key to mental strength--and feeling awesome instead of feeling Baaaad. How to Calm the Fuck Down!!
- •Ideals. Make sure your ideals about yourself and who you should be are reasonable and that they are your standards and not someone else's standards like your parents or some outside-of-you authorityThis part is important because we set standards for ourselves from our ideals. Also important because sometimes societiy's standards are more important than our personal ones and we have to be able to tell the difference Evaluate that shit!
- •Tracking. This is really really difficult if we feel horrid shame when we don't live up to our standards. Here's where you get that tolerating the intolerable deal going.So it's painful and hard when you recognize something inside of you that has to change and you keep comparing it to your ideal and you keep feeling like a failure. TOLERATE THAT SHIT and make incremental changes. Don't go All unconscious --stay present
- •Willpower. Remember that other list? Willpower is our strength to control our urges and it uses up glucose in the brain so it gets temporarily depleted. We can do things to fill that willpower back up but sometimes we have to TOLERATE the feeling of not having strength.And remember what I said in that other list, you can fill the willpower cup back up with exercise, good nutrition, meditation, and loving relationships
- •Impulse control baby!! What's the key??The key is how much are you focusing on Bad shit rather than Good shit? If I keep focusing on the black spot on the white rug, I never see the white rug. It makes me blame my feelings on something-- rather than solving problems. Try shifting your focus from the bad to the good, and when you feel bad tolerate that shit, and keep looking for the good and then do it again
- •EMOTION. Emotion is about movement. All emotions have three motivations-- to approach to avoid or to attack. When you are emotional, figure out which one of those movements is being triggered, and if it is safe to do so TOLERATE THAT SHIT.
- •Ha ha. Neuropsych lecture in a list!