1. The letter Y-U
    So I'm at the very very end of the alphabet after almost going through it twice.
  2. They're simply giving me a compliment
    "Who has class? You do!" "Thanks airline!"
  3. They're legitimately asking "Why you?"
    To which I say "Why not me?" 🎙⬇️
  4. It was someone's last day on the job
    This one might be legitimate because they seated us based on our rows, not the standard boarding groups. I'm assuming some guy, we'll call him Todd, got fired. He was in charge of assigning boarding groups manually, but is now being replaced by a robot monkey. Todd wanted to make a stand, so he started getting creative with the boarding groups. "Let's see a robot monkey do this!" Todd shouted from his cubicle. Go out in style Todd, I support you! This post has been going on for too long. Bye!
  5. UPDATE: This was my connecting flight
    I'm just saying... Nonsense.