COSTUMES I HAVE WORN

Halloween is right around the corner. I need some ideas for this year. current front runner: sexy Bernie Sanders.
  1. Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs.
    you know the scene. a nude body suit has never felt so natural. my only regret was this little gem didn't get more exposure. it's a current front runner for reuse.
  2. Machete from Machete
    went with the boyfriend at the time who was luz (aka shé) in her bikini top. maybe best couples costume I'll ever be a part of. wish I hadn't spilled beer all over that muscle suit. got confused for a duder numerous times.
  3. Zombea Arthur
    like zombie bea arthur. get it?! too soon? scared several children. mine wasn't nearly as good as the picture.
  4. trophy wife
    I painted my body gold, got a huge ring, blonde wig, and 80s prom dress to troll the streets. I've never felt better than painted gold.
  5. Peter Venkman from Ghostbusters
    for, like, three years in a row when I was a kid. I still regret getting rid of that proton pack and if my mom would make me another jumpsuit, I would live in that thing.