Movies Watched in 2017 but not all of them cause i started late

ok so these are movies i've watched this year starting a couple of days ago. jes me. hi world i sometimes refuse to capitalize
  1. King Arthur: Legend of the Sword
    bad/good/great: great
  2. King Arthur: Legend of the Sword
    critics seem to hate it. they're wrong. this is unapologetically guy ritchie. it's packed full of shit anyone who likes action movies will salivate over but it's probably too fast for your dad. a couple of shitty looking cgi scenes but i will forgive that.
  3. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2
    bad/good/great: good
  4. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2
    fucking jokes and jokes and jokes and not in a good way. in a lame way, actually. the formulaic approach to take what was good from the first one and do it again was obvious and heavy handed. and the baddie is pretty much Alcazar from futurama. "we all have needs. Mine was to make it with five weirdos and have them scrub my five castles." -alcazar
  5. A Hologram for the King
    bad/good/great: great
  6. A Hologram for the King
    went in with not a clue about it. i was surprised and happy wow about it wow! subtle dark comedy and then something unexpected. discovering it's based on an eggers novel makes me love it even more. great job, everyone!
  7. Colossal
    bad/good/great: good?
  8. Colossal
    for weeks afterward i couldn't decide if i liked it or not. no real meat to it but i read into the implications way too much and convinced myself the story in the gaps was great. now i'm thinking my imagination is just what's great. cool effects. good acting. interesting enough, but where are the characters here? in dumb town.
  9. IT (miniseries)
    bad/good/great: bad with good bits
  10. IT
    tim curry is great. bill has a ponytail. too much of what made the story great is changed. everything's rushed. needed more gore and needed less clown (gasp! what?!) yes. less clown. more Chud. excited about the 2017 movie! hope there's no child gangbang.
  11. It Comes at Night
    bad/good/great: great with a side of hummus
  12. It Comes at Night
    so very tense the whole way through. the movie starts in third gear and never drops below second, occasionally jumps to fourth. the actors are solid, even charlie from girls. it's like a fantastically executed telling of a story with which we are all now too familiar.
  13. Wonder Woman
    bad/good/great: good
  14. Wonder Woman
    an acceptable superhero movie. goofy scenes and dumb script. held my attention, even through an idiotic pretty woman-esque dress sequence at a bizarre point in the film. fight scenes looked pretty neat.
  15. the Conjuring
    bad/good/great: good!
  16. the Conjuring
    a solid horror movie! the "based on true events" bullshit is easy enough to deal with. lots of tasty nuggets of potential-but-best-left-alone-spin-offs later bastardized by the Annabelle movie(are there two of those?) and the clan of girls do a bang up job of looking terrified. cool tricks with light and cg (clothesline scene is tops). fun and scary like Insidious part one yeah points!
  17. the Conjuring 2
    bad/good/great: bad!
  18. the Conjuring 2
    trash. Ghostwatch did it nearly flawlessly and for a much lower price tag. so an evil nun demon, a mean old man ghost, and a slenderman evil thing walk into a pub and the director can't decide on which baddie to run with so he says fuck it, use them all. and make kids creepy cause fuck it. this movie is dumb!
  19. Full Metal Jacket
    bad/good/great: great +
  20. Full Metal Jacket
    This might be my favorite Kubrick film. who's to say?
  21. Baby Driver
    bad/good/great: great scott!
  22. Baby Driver
    the kid's cool. the chases are fucking cool. the music is really cool. the baddies are comically mean and antagonistic and jon hamm is cool. and spacey is whaaaaat? the love interest is the weakest thing here but whatever, she's shelly from twin peaks and SHE was cool so whatever. boom boom vroom. niiiiice. coolest movie of 2017. nice daddy cool boss
  23. Spider-Man Homecoming
    bad/good/great: best
  24. Spider-Man Homecoming
    best. marvel movie. ever.
  25. Dunkirk
    bad/good/great: great
  26. Dunkirk
    It's so pretty you can ignore the fact the non-linear storytelling is unnecessary.
  27. The Dark Tower
    bad/good/great: bad
  28. The Dark Tower
    jake is the protagonist and i'd be fine with that but they made him the hero. he has all the drive to protect he tower ... and the shine now? what a confusing and confused mess. it isn't even a reimagining of the books. it's receiving the tale of roland via game of telephone. a misunderstood guessing game at what someone thinks the story was. bummer. idris could have worked. matt m could've worked. the kid was cool and could've worked.
  29. Free Fire
    bad/good/great: good.50
  30. Free Fire
    the cast is funny as fuck and the action is fast to the point i was kind of confused for a spell. reminiscent of snatch, but not as good. characters brought charm though. the characters brought charm.
  31. The African Queen
    bad/good/great: good
  32. The African Queen
    cute. funny. great camera work. never really felt the romantic chemistry cause bogart kisses and hugs like a stiff dad.
  33. Heaven Knows, Mr. Allison
    bad/good/great: good.8
  34. Heaven Knows, Mr. Allison
    Robert Mitchum is Rocky Balboa.