My favorite loaf-shaped animals

Bodies come in all shapes, including that of "loaf."
  1. Guinea pigs
    Mini loaves that scream like souls in hell every time you crack open the fridge.
  2. Groundhogs
    Being loaf-shaped is not conducive to maintaining a sleek, aerodynamic gait, especially when tumbling away from the happy fat lady who just wants to cuddle.
  3. Guinea Fowl
    Teeny-tiny wings, shrunken prune for a head, and no shits given. Guinea Fowl is all of us.
  4. Harp Seal
    Unfortunately, it's signature loafish cuteness makes it comfort food for the waning polar bear population. The #loaflife has major downsides.
  5. Ulysses... My cat
    His loafy physique is hard earned and comes from his affinity for butter, cords to our very much UNwireless speakers, and the giant mosquitos who sneak in through giant mosquito sized holes in our screen.