KID RULES AND OBSERVATIONS

  1. If a plane landing sounds weird, there's a good chance it will crash
  2. 1 Jolt will keep you up all night and get you in trouble
  3. When you go out to eat with your parents the finest drink you can order is a Coke with grenadine
  4. Embassy Suites is extremely classy. They have a pool and elevators on the inside.
  5. Indian burns may never heal
  6. All kids are traumatized by the one new friend that came over for the first (and last) time and starting eating snacks without asking
  7. Kids are suspicious of families that only drink water at dinner and scared of families that drink soda at dinner
  8. Some people always smell like laundry
  9. One day you go over to a friend's house and they order pizza in the middle of the week and invite you to stay for dinner. For kids this is like Eyes Wide Shut
  10. You notice a new neighbor moving in with a kid a year younger or older than you. Your parents invite him over and you begin to panic.