Latest Statements From Harper Lee Press Conference Earlier This Afternoon:
- •"Yes I wrote the fucking book. Asshole. Next question."
- •"Yes it's a gun and it's pointed at your fucking balls. Same goes for that broad from ITV sitting in the second row. Next question."
- •"Gregory Peck? He was OK. A fair kisser. Next question."
- •"The food? Seriously? I live in a fucking rest home. The food here sucks. Next question."
- •"Nelle? Yes I read that too and 'No,' no one in my life has ever called me that and if I ever meet that cocksucker Van Dusen I'm going to call him out on it and then stick a fork up his ass. Next question."
- •"Well, my sincere hope is that the Times has the foresight not to give my book to that crankpot Kakutani. Because if they do she'll bury me."
- •MODERATOR: "OK. THANKS FOR COMING. NO MORE QUESTIONS."