Latest Statements From Harper Lee Press Conference Earlier This Afternoon:

  1. 1.
    "Yes I wrote the fucking book. Asshole. Next question."
  2. 2.
    "Yes it's a gun and it's pointed at your fucking balls. Same goes for that broad from ITV sitting in the second row. Next question."
  3. 3.
    "Gregory Peck? He was OK. A fair kisser. Next question."
  4. 4.
    "The food? Seriously? I live in a fucking rest home. The food here sucks. Next question."
  5. 5.
    "Nelle? Yes I read that too and 'No,' no one in my life has ever called me that and if I ever meet that cocksucker Van Dusen I'm going to call him out on it and then stick a fork up his ass. Next question."
  6. 6.
    "Well, my sincere hope is that the Times has the foresight not to give my book to that crankpot Kakutani. Because if they do she'll bury me."
  7. 7.