THINGS WRITERS DO TO PROCRASTINATE FROM WRITING

  1. Go on the internet to do research which consists of finding the fact you were looking for and then following other related links which eventually lead you to several online shopping sites where you spend a few hours picking up some things you've been meaning to buy but haven't had time to get
  2. Continually check email in case something really important comes in, preferably from your agent, although anything that's not spam is considered a legitimate missive in need of thoughtful reply
  3. Go to the bathroom even if you barely have to go and do research by reading whatever new magazine came in the mail or was downloaded onto your iPad as you sit and wait for something to happen gastrointestinally
  4. Masturbate
  5. Go to eat lunch under the conviction you will write while you eat or at least get some good thinking done while observing other diners for possible inspiration
  6. Go get coffee under the conviction you will write while you sip or at least get some good thinking done while observing other coffee drinkers for possible inspiration
  7. Go to a mall or shopping center to people watch for possible character ideas and also pick up a few items you forgot to buy online
  8. Go to a movie matinee to see how another writer who actually finished and sold her or his screenplay handled their structure and character development
  9. Lie down for a few minutes to figure out a story problem you've come up against and then fall asleep hoping that your subconscious will continue to work on the problem as you refresh your brain
  10. Seek out your spouse or significant other for a quick round of sex just because you need to take a break and clear your head (which often results in the aftermath of the above sleep state)
  11. Wash and gas up your car just in case you get an unexpected call to drive to a meeting or business lunch
  12. Work out, just to get your brain flowing or to figure out that story problem that didn't get solved by your brain during your nap
  13. Try to write funny lists on the List App