Written by an extremely bitchy, almost due pregnant woman
  1. "Are you sure there's only one baby in there?" Really? Is this necessary? I am aware that I am huge.
  2. Them: "How are you?" Me: "Tired." Them: "Just wait! You think you're tired now." This one really bothers me. I don't even know why. It just feels like it invalidates the fact that I sleep like shit at night and then have to carry around fifty extra pounds all day and am literally exhausted.
  3. "Man! You look like you could go at any time!" Once again, yes- I know that I am huge.
  4. "Any baby yet?" Oh shit, I didn't tell you? Yeah, he's 13 now. Just started playing soccer.
  5. "Do you think you could try to have the baby today?/ When do you think the baby is coming?" Hold on, I'll ask him. Trust me, if I could get this kid out of me at this very second, I would.
  6. "You look great!" Ok. This is just me being bitchy. I appreciate that compliment. I just feel like shit and am swollen and fat. Step away.