Gifts for a White Elephant

a white elephant is a type of gift exchange where you anonymously give people presents that your did not buy AKA things lying around your house
  1. Participation trophies
    for the people who never even participated
  2. Books that you've read and aren't going to reread
    Infinite Jest
  3. Books that you're not going to read
    Infinite Jest
  4. Drunk Amazon purchases
  5. Anything you bought from a high school fundraiser and had forgotten you had bought by the time you received it
  6. Anything you won by selling enough things in junior high fundraisers
  7. A letter predelivered informing them that you will not be going to the white elephant
  8. The "get one free" item from any television advertisement
  9. That box of unopened cereal
  10. Anything purchased by tickets won from machines rather than real money
  11. Whatever your grandma gave you when the gift was prefaced by "I was cleaning out my attic"
    not everyone's grandma was interesting in the past
  12. Your first born
  13. That thing you bought a second of because you couldn't find the first
  14. Self-help books
  15. Whatever you got from your last white elephant