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Not counting paperboy for The Post-Standard or temp jobs in New York.
- •1. McDonald's, Onondaga Blvd.I was sweeping the floor in front of the fry vat when the fire-suppression thing went off. Instant blizzard of white powder. Not my fault. A fan broke in the AC unit on the roof.
- •2. Night warehouse guy, Borden Ice Cream factory, North Syracuse.Plugging in a fan for the ladies on the half-gallon line, I got the cord caught in a conveyer belt, then my hand when I stupidly grabbed it. Totally my fault. The floor boss cut the belt. The EMT was an old family friend. No broken bones.
- •3. Teacher, Saint Joseph School, Bronx.4th-grade math class. Kid we'll call Thomas is calmly cutting pages out of his math book with a nice pair of scissors. I approach him from behind and casually take them. I've still got those scissors. Not sure what became of Thomas.
Have fun, but please, only great meaningful tunes.
I passed the test.
- 1.Do you believe Clarence Thomas or Anita Hill?
- 2.Do you own a gun?
- 3.Have you ever voted Republican for President?
- •HorsepissCould be crappy beer, or JFK's daily pharma cocktail
- •I need to see a man about a horse.Could be the same horse, or that somebody needs to pee
- •Pee like a racehorseIn terms of perceived quantity (a lot)
1-4 stolen from Mark Helprin's "Winter's Tale," 5-7 stolen from Woody Allen's "Crimes and Misdemeanors," 8 a gift from Rev. C. Read Heydt.
(So most recent, 4th most recent and so on)
- •A prince of late night, 2016.
- •A prince of late night, 1969.
- •Two devils in the window, Artisan Antiques & Jewelry, Cleveland Heights.
- •Its population is smaller than greater Chicago and every bit as polite.
- •Its land area is about the same as Colorado, if Colorado were cut into 2 big and many smaller pieces and stretched and shaped into the space between Maine and the Carolinas
- •Radio New Zealand National combines the eclectic best of old US network radio, the BBC, the ABC, and public radio, sounding at times like a big market local US station circa 1970 with all the time a story deserves and more.