Things I Wish Someone Had Warned Me About Before I Wrote an Autobiography

It was still worth it, though.
  1. Negative reviews are a bitch
  2. You'll accidentally piss off a friend for mentioning them in a way they didn't like
  3. You'll accidentally piss off a friend for leaving them out
  4. Strangers suddenly know you very well, and don't realize that you don't know them...
  5. ...Sometimes you'll get an email with their own life story
  6. Like a Rorschach test, people will see what they're looking for and make interpretations you never intended...
  7. ...sometimes they'll act on that and hold you accountable
    Somehow I inspired one guy to drop out of high school to become a pro cyclist.
  8. You'll be constantly misquoted.
  9. Someone will skim it, find one sentence that seems offensive out of context, and then tweet what an asshole you are
    They'll also write a bad review
  10. Old memories can make you cry when you write them down
  11. You'll save a ton of money on therapy after all that introspection and catharsis