1. Barbie. She was adorably cute when I was in 2nd grade. Long, brown hair and popular.
  2. Then in line, coming in from recess one day, she farted in front of me. A nasty SBD.
  3. I was sure it was her. It was rank.
  4. That instant, she became an ex-crush.
  5. I'm sorry I was shallow. I was eight.