Funny as in Haha. Funny as in Weird.
  1. Louis CK was in my dream - he was my best friend.
    In real life we've never met.
  2. The premise of the dream was that Louis CK and two other people where the hosts of a morning talk show similar to @CBSThisMorning
    The other two people were a man and a woman, both famous. I have no idea who they were, but in the dream they were every bit as famous as Louis CK.
  3. I was just hanging out at the studio as they were filming the day's show, a segment where they were standing at a kitchen counter.
  4. I was right beside the camera, eating ice cream.
    Why was I eating ice cream at 7:30 in the morning? I have no clue.
  5. For some reason this was pretty melty ice cream. Almost like soft serve.
  6. During a commercial break Louis CK made some joke about me and I mined flinging a spoonful of ice cream at him.
  7. Being a smart ass, he dared me, just as they were coming back from break.
  8. As cameras started rolling, I did it. I flung a huge spoonful of ice cream and it hit Louis CK right in the face.
  9. The audience started laughing nervously.
  10. The three stars kept right on going as if nothing happened. Ice cream was stuck to Louis's face.
  11. I tried it again, hitting he woman in the neck.
  12. More nervous laughter.
  13. Next time I hit the other man square in the nose.
  14. Serious laughter from both the audience and me.
  15. The next shot hit Louis CK in the forehead.
  16. The next hit the woman right in the mouth.
  17. By now even the producers were laughing in hysterics.
  18. I was doubled over, trying not to pee my pants.
  19. Then it happened. I couldn't hold it any longer.
  20. The floodgates broke.
  21. I started peeing my pants. I could feel hot pee running down my leg.
  22. That's when I woke up.
  23. My first thought was "Oh my god, I wet the bed!!"
  24. I could feel hot pee running down my leg.
  25. I was trying desperately to stop peeing.
  26. I managed, it barely.
  27. I sat up, disgusted.
  28. I started accessing the situation, stood up to see how much of the bed was wet...
  29. My shorts were dry.
  30. My legs were dry.
  31. I hadn't actually peed.
  32. It had just been a dream. A dream warning me to wake up because I needed to pee.
  33. Nothing. The bed was dry.
  34. Still all dry, I raced to the bathroom and peed like crazy.
  35. But man, it felt so real.