The Day I Stopped Loving Barbie
I don't know her last name, though I probably did at the time.
- •We were in second grade and she was beautiful.
- •She was popular, and somehow still liked me.
- •She had dark brown hair almost to her waist.
- •Sometimes she let me touch her hair.
- •It was true love. For real.
- •In line coming in from recess she farted.
- •An SBD, but super bad.
- •Like deadly bad.
- •And I'd been standing right behind her smelling her hair.
- •I almost fainted.
- •From that moment forward I did not find her attractive in the least.