This memory just rushed back to me out of nowhere so I chased it down and made a list, forcing myself to fill in the details and savor it for a bit. I'm still trying to piece together a complete list of movies we watched...
  1. •
    In high school I hosted a movie night most every Friday night.
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    Which was a hilarious idea because my mom and I lived in a very tiny student housing apartment that was about 450 square feet.
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    with a very tiny living room (about 12x12)
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    and a very very tiny 14" box TV (we used to have an old 70s black and white tv and had only recently upgraded to color!) 📺
  5. •
    I never thought to be embarrassed of my little house, which says a lot for both my mom and my friends.
  6. •
    It was the mid-90s.
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    I rented the weirdest, most obscure movies I could find.
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    Sometimes I had to track them down through my mom's connections at the college library.
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    And every Friday people came over and crammed onto my crappy futon or sat on the floor and gathered around my tiny TV.
  10. •
    My proudest moment was once when I got ahold of a bootleg copy of Todd Haynes' Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story, a complete biopic told with Barbie dolls, which had become totally unavailable due to a cease and desist order from Mattel.
  11. •
    A few times my crush even showed up. Once he sat next to me on aforementioned crappy futon and we watched John Waters' Crybaby, which I loved, and at the end he said he thought it was too campy. He didn't like movies that weren't based in reality. He actually called himself a realistic idealist. I loved him anyway.
  12. •
    This girl I admired so much came over once and brought Harold and Maude, which was her favorite. We watched it and I thought it was so weird and I loved it so much. I felt like she had bestowed it upon me. I was now One Who Knew about Harold and Maude.
  13. •
    It's quite possible that being seen at my tiny high school movie night set some contemporary filmmakers on their road to success, as we watched many first films: Spanking the Monkey (David O. Russell), Sweetie (Jane Campion), Strictly Ballroom (Baz Luhrmann), Bottle Rocket (Wes Anderson). You're welcome, guys.
  14. •
    We also watched: Earth Girls Are Easy, Repo Man, My Brilliant Career, Tie Me Up Tie Me Down, Flirting, Heavenly Creatures, Hackers, Pump Up the Volume, True Stories, Chungking Express, Do the Right Thing, and La Jetée.
  15. •
    I had a really lovely time digging through these memories and remembering how my love for movies started, and how my mom fed that love by exposing me to interesting stuff (though as a 15yo I was mortified when she took me to see Clerks, I appreciated it later).
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    Not to mention what it felt like to sit on a crappy futon with the boy I liked, even if he was a little conventional,
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    and have the coolest girl show up and share her favorite movie,
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    and have such great friends who happily watched whatever weird thing I put in the VCR (yep) and probably had to squint to see the little screen, as they crammed themselves into all the nooks of my living room.
  19. •
    nostalgia, guys. 😭😍😭😍