NARRATIVES I WANT TO BE EXCLUDED FROM
Inspired by @darshnim .. And of course tswift
- •That time my mother came to pick me up from my college apartment at 7 AM and I wasn't thereAnd the subsequent 4 hour ride where I was still markedly drunk
- •Anytime I have consumed alcohol and seen @sar_marieee 's significant others
- •My former roommate's work lifeOr his life in general
- •That time my best friend joined a sorority and I got drunk in the bathroom of their formal because they were intolerable
- •Every time I've broken a shoe while a mile or so away from homeFlip flops. Boots. Heels.
- •When I fell in a ditch. And the second time
- •My guy friends love lives
- •The time my friend jumped off a bridge and shattered her shoulderAnd Martha had to wipe her butt. Actually I pretty solidly excluded myself from that one.
- •When someone mentions I have cheese in my hair