THINGS THAT WOULD BE CONSIDERED "ON BRAND"

For my carefully cultivated social media persona aka drunk tweets and doing it for the gram
  1. Getting cheese dip in my hair
  2. Wearing a Hufflepuff cardigan to a very formal work environment
  3. #team things
    #teamnopants #teamnobabies #teamjane #teambrad (okay those are contradictory)
  4. Getting sitcoms canceled by enjoying them
    RIP happy endings
  5. Buying tequila even though no one else wants to drink it
  6. Watching a documentary and forgetting 98 percent of the information but being blindingly angry about a particular jump cut multiple years later
    And being able to describe both the offending frames in excruciating detail while turning red in the face in front of a room of people who could give a fuck
  7. Telling people it's time to "bounce"
  8. 😂😭😁💃🏻🔥🦄💁🏻🌵🧀🖕🏻🙈