Things I saw when going out this past weekend in my hometown that I really wish I hadn't

  1. Leathery tanned white men clearly going through a mid-life crisis
  2. Chunky highlights
  3. Some serious cougar action
    But what do you call the guy who typically plays the role opposite the cougar...cause it was really cougee action
  4. Dozens of men surrounding the dance floor casually singing Blurred Lines
  5. Too many of these shirts
  6. The lead singer of the band putting a dreadlock wig on before singing a reggae song