How I Deal With Hangovers

Tips from someone who can only handle a glass or two of wine before getting tipsy
  1. I lay down in bed fully dressed and feel sea sick
  2. I slowly change into pajamas over the course of two hours
  3. I think about getting up and drinking some water but the effort involved becomes overwhelming
  4. I lay helpless as my cat decides my hip is a good place to take a nap
  5. I roll with the sea sick feeling and pretend to pay attention to whatever video or podcast my fiancé tries to share with me
  6. I pass out
  7. I wake up at 2 am and am insanely thirsty but still decide it is too much effort to get out of bed
  8. I can't go back to sleep so I scroll through Instagram and have serious envy of other people's lives
  9. I put on a podcast or music until I pass out again
  10. Wake up the next morning with a horrible headache
  11. Sit up in bed and try to figure out where I went wrong in life
  12. Go to work and stuff my face with a hug, greasy breakfast sandwich and a huge cup of coffee.
  13. Reflect on my life and my choices.