ACCIDENTAL SUPERPOWER

Do you have a skill you have no idea how/why it happened? I do.
  1. Boy Repeller.
    When I was little there were preteen boys at church who loves to poke me and tease me. I apparently grew fed up with them and any time they approached I would tell them to "Go away." I seem to have evolved this skill into wordless, eye contact-less, telepathic communication: it's 20 years later and boys don't come within 15 feet of me.
  2. Invisibility
    The older I get the more invisible I become to the entire culture, particularly younger people. I sometimes don't even set off automatic doors. Upside: I get to hear everything because people don't 'see' me.
    Suggested by   @andersun
  3. In-the-Way Woman
    No matter where I choose to stand, walk or sit, I'm directly in someone's path. I really shine at weddings, where I somehow always end up between the bride and groom, but also useful in tour groups, church services(just kidding, I never go to church) and in my everyday forays to the grocery store.
    Suggested by   @jennifergster
  4. Sweater Destroyer
    If it's white, I will drop chocolate cake or spaghetti on it. Every time. No cashmere is safe.
    Suggested by   @dubstep
  5. Awkward-moment Generator
    What's that? You have a simple social situation or common societal transaction coming up? And you wanted it to devolve into an awkward, potentially remorse-inducing experience? I'm your girl.
    Suggested by   @biz
  6. Flypaper for Freaks
    And not the good kind, but the ones who fail the "Bluetooth or Invisible Foe" test. They pick me out, camp next to me, and engage me in their delusions. Every. Time.
    Suggested by   @whirledpeas
  7. Direction-Giver
    No matter where I am, people will stop me and ask me for directions. I've been asked for directions in every country I've ever visited, in multiple languages. A few months back someone crossed four lanes of traffic to ask me for directions as I was driving. Someone once woke me up during rush hour on the subway to ask me for directions. As an added bonus: I canNOT give directions. I barely know where I am, ever (I literally bought a compass when I moved to NYC so I could get places).
    Suggested by   @nelle
  8. Growth Stunt-er
    In elementary I was usually the tallest of my friends and just considered tall in general. I couldn't be an orphan in the 'Annie' school play because I was too tall and older looking. Which is a JOKE if you know me now. I get mistaken for 15 at 22, today. Anyways- I constantly wished I was shorter or just short in general. Every single day I thought of this/wished it . When I want something, I don't back down. It must have worked because I now stand at just 5"1.
    Suggested by   @Deanndre