I HAVE THE *WEIRDEST* HOBBY...

Inspired by @ListPrompts.
  1. I've Listed about this before a little but it's definitely my weirdest hobby. By a lot.
  2. Sometimes when I'm sitting in my LoveSac and feeling really lonely
  3. I download the Whisper (occasionally Tindr) app.
  4. I post something about how I've never kissed a man,
  5. Because for some reason that's like catnip to guys.
  6. (Sidenote: why is that? Is it like a conquest thing? It's bizarre, no?)
  7. I instantly get messages from all kinds of males,
  8. From halfway sweet to super creepy.
    "I'll take you on a date, bring you home, and kiss you good night at your door." ||| "Gurl I bet your panties are creamed thru every day."
  9. I message back and forth with the normal ones for a bit,
  10. Until they either ask me for a photo or ask for a meet up.
  11. Then I get immensely horrified, and remember that I am not equipped to enter this realm.
  12. And then I delete the app.
  13. It's a ridiculous hobby, I know,
  14. But it helps remind me of *why* I'm so immutably single,
  15. And strengthens my resolve that, if I ever DO reach the point where the thought of going on a date doesn't make me want to jump off a balcony,
    Unlikely.
  16. I can take steps to change it then.
  17. But, until that happens, I'm ¿probably? better off to just leave it alone.
  18. @biz Here are a few I've found. I'm sure there are more. Starting with the classiest of the lot.
  19. Always with the pictures.
  20. Pics pics pics.
  21. I don't think he even knew what I was talking about.
  22. WHO IS JANE AUSTEN???
    WTDH?!?!?!?