LR: HOW MY DAD HELPED ME GET OVER MY FEAR OF DUCKS

  1. When I was little--REALLY little, like couldn't talk yet, sitting in a high chair little--I was petrified of ducks.
  2. We're not sure about the origins, but I think it started here:
  3. One of my favorite short shows to watch was our tapes of Disney Singalongs.
  4. On one of these tapes, Professor Von Drake--a duck--stuck his head through a life preserver and filled up the entire screen.
    It was horrifying.
  5. Sometimes, on an irregular basis, I would be sitting in my high chair, positively giddy--
  6. Then suddenly look down the hallway, the color draining from my face--
  7. And I would start wailing about the duck.
  8. My mom legitimately grew concerned we had an actual ghost.
  9. This went on for a solid two years.
  10. When we moved from the house on Dancy Lane, I was certain the duck would follow us to the new house.
  11. I became restless about the duck's new home and how it would affect us.
  12. Finally, the day before we moved, my dad decided to end my fears.
  13. He showed me a key, then placed it in my little 3.5 year old hand.
  14. He led me downstairs to the basement.
  15. We walked over to a closet, one we had used for storing miscellaneous items.
  16. He pointed to the key in my hand, and told me that was the key to that closet door.
  17. He took the key, turned it in the lock, then let me try to open the door. It wouldn't budge.
  18. He told me that he'd locked the duck inside that closet,
  19. And that we were going to throw that key away.
  20. Which meant that the duck couldn't follow us to the new house.
  21. According to my parents, I never mentioned the duck again. My phobia was cured.