1. (Possible TW?) No details, but this week's been...rough. Ashamed of backing out (again), I honestly considered shutting down my account because I know you're all fed up with me being a drama queen, talking about being suicidal whilst never actually swallowing the pills, but I knew it wouldn't be fair to this community hurt by another suicide.
    I guess I'll just tell you. I wasn't alone in my house yesterday when I was staring at the little disks in my hand, debating whether or not taking the rest of the bottle would end me or just cause more medical bills for my family (I've done extensive research on the subject.) He finally persuaded me to open the door wide enough to drag me out of the hellscape inside my mind. Today he said he just wanted to make me smile again. I put on makeup et al this morning, and decided to really try.
  2. —————————————
  3. Preface I Wrote Beforehand: I'm not going to lie. I really really really hope this movie is fantastic. I've adored Emma + Ryan as a film couple since 2011's CRIMINALLY underrated Crazy, Stupid, Love. and I just don't want that iconic pairing to be screwed up in my mind palace. 😬
    You guys don't understand. That movie changed. my. life.
  4. When I was following the production of La La Land I didn't realize how much hype would eventually surround it, and I'm just really really protective over it and I really really need it to not disappoint me. There have been so many examples of films being made that I was ecstatic to see and then ended up a disappointment—
    either to me or to the world at large which is humiliating on an entirely different level. I grew up on old school musicals (a la Rogers & Hammerstein style), have been teased about that my whole life, and am so so nervous that this movie is going to let me down. I'm so nervous about it that I'm not even making sense right now but WOW am I petrified. 🤞🙏💜
  5. [2 hours and 8 minutes later...]
  6. Well.
  7. Alright disclaimer: I still love Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone.
  8. And I'm not going to go listing all the things I disliked about the film.
    I know I'm apparently the only human on the planet who didn't swoon over it. If you really want to know my opinions, DM me. But I'm not going to spoil the fun for at large.
  9. But, to put it simply, it did not meet my expectations.
  10. However.
  11. I did have a moment to be nominated for Most Outstanding:
  12. The moment when the preview popped up that said "Rated PG for 'some action violence, peril and frightening images'"
  13. And my heart leapt into my chest because
  14. I
  15. KNOW
  16. WHAT
  17. THAT
  18. MEANS
  19. My eyes welled up before the customized-for-this-film Disney Castle came onscreen.
  20. And then
  21. There was Kevin Kline being spooked and dragged away.
  22. And then, as Emma Watson opened those enormous castle doors, the tears gushed down my cheeks.
  23. And that, ladies and gentleman, was my Most Outstanding Moment of La La Land.
  24. Honorable Mention to John Legend's song, because I sincerely enjoyed that bit a good deal.
  25. Conclusion: I didn't hate the movie. It simply didn't make me fall in love as I'd expected it to. At all. Ergo, when it comes to Emma+Ryan, they will remain Best as Hannah and Jacob in Crazy, Stupid, Love.
    Luckily for me, he didn't love it too much either. So we got to discuss it over salad and breadsticks at Olive Garden. (PS: Did you know those giant salad tongs are, like, SUPER hard to use two-handed? Try it next time you're there. I'm guaranteeing belly laughs.)
  26. 64 days.
  27. Giphy
    PPS: Almost forgot the other best part! We saw it matinee which meant tickets were $4 each.
  28. ✨💛🌙
    Now it's time for more perfect Emma Watson bingeing: Colonia.
  29. 12:47 am: HOLY RAVIOLI YOU GUYS.
    THIS. MOVIE. Deeply impressed and equally horrified. 👏👏👏
  30. Epilogue: La La Land may not have swept me off my feet, but the fact that I was fortunate enough to see it with someone who often makes me feel like I'm living in a tastefully comedic fairytale does.
    ...even when I look like a hyperactive gremlin.