Things I would do if I worked in a pizzeria

  1. Eat all of the mozzarella
  2. Cut myself with the pizza roll-y cutter
  3. Eat all of the pizza I bled on because I cut myself in the above point
    They can't sell it and I can cut away the parts I bled on
  4. Eat all of the ricotta
  5. Burn myself on the pizza oven
  6. Drop every other pizza