Could also be titled poor choices that are illogical whatsoever. (@devondolan)
  1. Granola bars from office pantry = breakfast
    I also hoard gum from the office. 🙊
  2. 1/2 of overpriced pad thai you shouldn't have seamless-ed = lunch
    This is always a mistake. Always.
  3. Other 1/2 of seamless pad thai = dinner
    If you make poor choices, at least ration them out.
  4. Hors d'oeuvres served at a work event = dinner
    Be warned ladies, though the fancier the event the nicer the options, other women won't even touch or look at the food. But you do what you gotta do.
  5. Beer = bread and potatoes
  6. Wine = daily fruit serving
    Bonus for sangria or fruity cocktails with actual fruit in them.
  7. Walking 15 blocks home instead of taking the subway/cab = workout
    Who needs spin classes?