Great people-watching as my fiancé tries to find finishing touches for a cosplay.
  1. Elderly couple walks in and the woman says (too loudly) "oh, look, they've got shorts."
    She grabs the first pair she sees, and dangles them in front of her husband's lower half to eyeball if they might fit. He ignores all of this, and continues his slow walk toward the home goods. I duck down among men's jackets to hide my laughter. My fiancé pretends he doesn't know me.
  2. A woman approximately my age and what appears to be her mother argue about whether an antique crib is "perfect" or "a death trap."
    It's the mother of this pair who is pro-antique, and I agree— that crib was cool as shit. I pretend to browse pint glasses while I listen in. Mom eventually loses. She gives the crib one last nostalgic glance as they move on.
  3. Young man, 20 years old at most, sits on the floor making four deliberate piles of record albums around him.
    He picks up the next record from the shelf, considers it heavily, and sets it into one of the three piles to his left. There is one smaller pile to his right. I pretend to want to show my fiancé a small wine rack just to get a closer look. We don't drink wine. His piles of music have seriously clogged the walkway along the back wall. I deduce that his right pile is "to buy now," and the left piles are "no," "maybe," and "hide somewhere else in the store so I can buy these next payday."
  4. My fiancé stalks an approximately ten-year-old boy in the hopes that the boy will put down that Nerf gun so he can buy it for himself.
    In one of the two racks of toys, my fiancé found a small Nerf gun. This gun would work well as the base for a gun he needs to make for his character. His character has TWO guns, though, and my fiancé wishes there was a seco... Wait. This gun is one of a pair, and some kid found its twin on the other rack. Unacceptable! He's walking away with it! This can't happen! My fiancé covertly follows the boy over to women's clothing where he asks mom. She said no! Score!
  5. Two tween girls giggle at the VHS tapes
    Someone dropped off a well-loved Disney collection, and I think about the amount of money that this agglomeration was worth in VHSs heyday (Goodwill would have probably made room in the glass cabinets for it). The girls aren't giggling at the movies, but the VHSs themselves. Yes, they're huge. I wonder if they've ever seen a VHS tape in real life until this very moment.