Where I work, every meeting is a Mashup of all the meetings that came before it.
  1. Someone walks in with a neck beard
    Drink. Also? Gross.
  2. Someone on the conference bridge says they were talking on mute
    Drink. Also? Bullshit, you weren't paying attention.
  3. Someone says "correct me if I'm wrong"
    Drink. Also? Just stop.
  4. Someone gets up and leaves before the meeting is over.
    Drink. Also? If you make it out, send help.
  5. No one has a Starbucks cup.
    Drink. And pray they all had caffeine before they showed up.
  6. Any of the following words/phrases are used: fiscal, integration, moving forward, synergy, collaborative, next steps, hard stop, take it offline, prioritization.
    Drink, drink, drink.
  7. Someone uses an acronym you don't know.
    Drink. Also? STFU.