THINGS I LEARNED ABOUT ACTRESS GILLIAN JACOBS ON WIKIPEDIA

  1. 1.
    In 2006, The New York Times called her "a stunning Juilliard graduate who has the glow of a star in the making."
  2. 2.
    She's a teetotaler.
  3. 3.
    She once played a character called Cherry Daiquiri in the movie Choke.
  4. 4.
    Wait... Teetotaler? Doesn't that mean she doesn't drink?
  5. 5.
    She's been cast on a new Netflix show to debut in 2016.
  6. 6.
    Why doesn't she drink?
  7. 7.
    She has done a voice part on American Dad.
  8. 8.
    I don't trust people that don't drink.
  9. 9.
    She's a fan of professional wrestling.
  10. 10.
    Okay now I'm really confused.
  11. 11.
    What's so confusing? A wrestling fan can't also be an actress?
  12. 12.
    No, sure that's fine. But a wrestling fan that doesn't drink? Doesn't pass the smell test.
  13. 13.
    Agree to disagree then. Can we at least agree she's a solid actress with a bright future?
  14. 14.
    Totally. Shame she doesn't drink though.