1. Dad: "Boyfriend? You're too young to have a boyfriend"
    Thanks dad I'm 20
  2. Friend #1: "you talk too much and some guys don't like that"
    Talking's the best! You're clearly deluded
  3. Friend #1 again: "you're too friendly and not flirty enough"
    but how do I flirty
  4. Friend #2: "why are you asking me this"
    you are a terrible friend
  5. Friend #3: "because you spend all your time here and don't meet anyone"
    Here being the computer science building, also known as my second home because I was fool enough to pick an incredibly hard degree. Possibly true
  6. Friend #1 again (we had a long talk about this): "you think you're being really obvious, but like you're not."
    Turns out adding someone on Facebook is not a clear indication that you want to bang
  7. Girl friend #1: "your standards are too high"