Eight Alternatives to Spending Your Money at Starbucks

  1. Get out of bed and cry while you go about your day
  2. Dig through your belongings for a Starbucks gift card that probably only has enough on it for an iced tea
  3. Be a Neanderthal and brew your own coffee
  4. Call in sick to work
  5. Hit your friends up to buy you coffee
  6. Forget about waking up early and go back to sleep
  7. Eat a coffee flavored hard candy and hope it works
  8. Buy coffee at a place that isn't Starbucks (yes, these actually exist)