I'll Be Alone Forever 📂

not because I care which way you roll the TP, but for all of the following:
  1. I think the bath mat is there to cradle my newly clean, DRY feet. it's not for wet feet, because then it stays wet for hours, and I don't need that.
    use your towel to dry your feet 🛀
  2. hummus stays in whatever shape you just dipped your veggies, right? well looking at a veggie divot annoys me. I want each hummus session to end with a smooth layer of chickpea goodness
    exactly zero of my current and former roommates share this desire
  3. sometimes I speak in emojis
    emojis, bitmojis, whatever. also, this is my go-to: 😑😑
  4. I work a lot
    a lot of strange, isolating hours. today, for instance, I worked 18 hours. I could make a whole list about interactions that are not conducive to working 18 hour days: let's just start with pets, plants, and humans 🐩🌱👫
  5. cheese isn't allowed in my home
    it's That Thing I Can't Be Near Because I Cannot Stop Myself (yes I am eating it right now as I write this bullet point). it is my addiction. I, of all people, know how vital a role cheese plays in basically every meal, so I get that people who behave normally around cheese can't casually not have it
  6. sans peer pressure, I might listen to pop country and show tunes 24/7
    don't get me wrong, billy joel is my #1 and have a strange passion for hip hop and I get hyped about taylor swift, but if we are talking about 6+ hour road trip, my go-to is Broadway. plus I can't sing
  7. really, I can't sing
    but that doesn't stop me. I don't do karaoke, that is my only exception
  8. lots of people do things socially that I prefer to do alone
    working out, traveling, marathon training, getting all up into a Netflix series... does this go away? is this just something all people go through in their late 20s?
  9. my own expectations are a self-fulfilling prophecy
    🔮🔮 this is the real reason