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I'm not a rich man. In fact, I'm a poor man. So poor, in fact, that I hardly even know how money works or what it would even feel like to have "enough" money so that I didn't have to worry about not having enough money.
  1. Women
    I've spent so much fucking money on women it's ridiculous. When I was 16, I once had to pay for an $800 long distance phone bill because I was "dating" a girl in NY while I lived in SC. I have zero recollection of any of those conversations, but I sure would love $800 right now.
  2. Restaurants
    I literally just spent $47 on two cocktails and an appetizer of short rib pot stickers. It was fine, but I soooo want that $47 back. I'd feel better about it all if it were like $30. But it's not.
  3. Batman T-shirts
    I'm pretty much a world record holder for the most Batman T-shirts owned by one person. I have like 120 or so. T-shirts. That feature Batman on them. They're all I wear. Still, I mean, at an average of $20 a shirt, we're talking like $2,000 worth of shirts. Would I sell them all this very second for $2000? Probably.
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