HOW TO GROCERY SHOP FOR ONE PERSON
Inspired by @washingtonpost
- •Stouffers Mac n Cheese.Four boxes, Satisfying Serving size. Because Stouffers anything. But especially Mac n cheese. Because fat and sodium make everything taste divine. And you need a lot. Of both. Especially if you're dehydrated.
- •1 jumbo jar hot Giardinera.Because Sodium. Great for a hangover when you need extra. You know, to combat dehydration.
- •Ramen. Spicy.Because Ramen. Spicy. And sodium.
- •Bottled waterBecause you're trying not to drink so much pop. And because dehydration.
- •Bananas and Fig Newtons.With a cup or three of coffee? Breakfast of champions! Because breakfast is important. Yeah, not much sodium, BUT plenty of caffeine. And potassium. And may I say that caffeine and potassium are the shit when you're out of fat and sodium and you're dehydrated.
- •A 12 pack of Coke. Not diet.Just in case the water doesn't cut it. And because Coke. And sodium. And dehydration.
- •Cheese. Chunk, block, shred, cream.Because cheese. And fat.
- •Sour CreamBecause sour cream. And fat.
- •Cookies or some such.Because you don't really eat sweets, but you might if you run out of cheese and sour cream. And fat. And sodium.
- •A 12 pack of beer.Because maybe company. Or because maybe just getting shitfaced by yourself and drunk texting, then regretting it the next day while you eat a whole jar of hot Giardinera and a whole Stouffers Satisfying Servings Mac n Cheese, and drink a dozen bottles/cans of water/Coke in bed with your cats and Netflix.
- •Tylenol.Extra strength. Because. Yeah...