PEOPLE ON AIRPLANES

  1. Chatty empty nester
    Man or woman, their kids are out of the house and they miss talking to "young people"
  2. Conservative [enter religion here]
    They look slightly uncomfortable for whatever reason. (Good and bad). Can't miss the hats and earlocks. The long skirts and bonnets. The robes and sandals.
  3. High school sports team
    They look sooooo cool with their matching scrunchies, sense of independence, and Annie's pretzels. The world is bigger than the Mid Atlantic Regional Semi-Finals for whatever. Just wait
  4. Happy baby
    Giggling. Sleeping. Playing peekaboo around the head rest. Better entertainment than any random NBC sitcom.
  5. All other babies
    The majority of babies you see on planes. Red scrunched up greasy faces. They are little screaming Devils.
  6. People in first class
    Ass holes and flight crew just trying to remember why they like their jobs
  7. Girl with head buried in list-app
    The chatty empty nester next to me might have seen me furiously trying to post this before take off