48 Laws of Power. I hate the book and the people who reference it.
  1. Never order a cappuccino -- nothing says weak like foam.
  2. When asked about whip cream, always say no
  3. Sentences beginning with the phrase, "my mother told me..."
  4. Downloading an app to track your girlfriend's period
  5. Shaving daily and/or using the phrase smooth as a baby's bottom
  6. Wearing anything with the name Jeter on the back
  7. Watching Sexy and the City, even season 2
  8. Saying you haven't finished watching Breaking Bad
  9. Saying anything ever is sexist-- you can think it but never say it out loud.
  10. Face painting
  11. Owning walking petting a dog under 40 pounds
  12. Trying to touch the net on a ten foot regulation hoop
  13. Saying "it's cold in here" anywhere and at any time
  14. Using the phrase my girlfriend wouldn't like that
  15. Shaving hair on any part of your body except the face. You're a man live with it.
  16. The phrase "smooth as a baby's bottom
  17. Parting your hair
  18. Singing listening crying to Lionel Richie
  19. Telling any and all college drunk stories
  20. Winking
  21. Whistling
  22. Being a vegan
  23. Doing cross fit
  24. Having more than two pages of apps on your phone
  25. Fitbit on your arm ... Really?
  26. Paying for porn
  27. Posting on Facebook more than once a day
  28. Owning a cat
  29. Talking about why you drive a Prius
  30. Mastering rap lyrics and busting them out with a stupid tough guy face and hand signals
  31. Living with your parents after college
  32. Talking about poker
  33. Going to see a Mark Wahlberg movie with another guy
  34. Watching UFC and screaming at your tv
  35. Holding a shopping bag and walking around a mall
  36. Dating super models who don't speak English
  37. Dressing like your son
  38. That the last book you read cover to cover was in college
  39. Not knowing who Sophia Rossi is
  40. Referring to your college by its location, but by the town it's located in...you know who you are!
  41. Clear nail polish
  42. Driving gloves and driving shoes
  43. Hosting an Oktoberfests outside of Germany
  44. Having more than one app page on your phone
  45. Using the clicking sound for typing on your iPad
  46. Calling your parents daily
  47. Sleeping with chicks in your parents house after 37 years of age
  48. Forgetting to list