10 IDEAS THAT WILL EXPONENTIALLY INCREASE YOUR HAPPINESS IF YOU CUT THEM OUT OF YOUR BRAIN

This week i turn 175 years old. My life has been a long road of struggle,but I've learned much from the pain. At age 130 I found the keys to happiness which i hereby offer to you the people of listapp free of charge. Cut these ideas out of your mind and the gates iof heaven will open for you.
  1. 1.
    That life is fair
    Who told you it is? On the macro level if we're talking fairness think about how anyone who has a phone to look at this app is on the top zillionth of one percent of existences in all of human history. And what did you do that was so terrific to rate that? On the micro getting mad at the unfairness of life is like getting mad at dice for rolling 7. Which is the most common number
  2. 2.
    That you are owed anything
    Talking to you millennials. This is your disease. Sooner you get over it the sooner you might stumble your way to some happiness
  3. 3.
    That you shouldn't be judged on your appearance
    I don't mean attractiveness which you shouldn't be judged on but absolutely will be (most of all by those who claim to be above such things). I mean how you present yourself. Do you look like a serious person? If you wear sweatpants and diaphanous t's to work, terrific. Don't be surprised that no one trusts you to run their company
  4. 4.
    That anyone will ever change
    Your boyfriend/girlfriend won't. Your boss won't. Your oldest friend wont. Especially when they promise they will they definitely dont. If the success of any relationship or situation depends on anyone being in any way different than they are from the get go, run while you can. (Addendum: sometimes you can bully seduce or bribe someone in to changing. They will hate you for it for the rest of their lives)
  5. 5.
    That people mean what they say
    People say whatever makes the conversation go easier. Which generally means telling you what they think you want to hear. Occasionally they correlates with their actual feelings and intentions but such correlation is purely coincidental. Judge actions. Ignore words
  6. 6.
    That hobbies matter in relationships
    When we first get to know people, we spend a lot if time focussed on hobbies - do you like the same music, TV shows. Want to travel to the same places. Makes sense. What the hell else you going to talk about with someone you hardly know. But we think those things say much more about us than they do. Once you're building a life together you have life to talk about and hobbies fade drastically in importance. If anything you're happy to havr them as your own private place
  7. 7.
    That art changes anything
    Believing this only causes frustration. The only political purpose it can ever serve is to make people feel good about themselves for believing what they already believe. But then ary doesn't seek to persuade or it is propaganda. Art seeks to express itself only.
  8. 8.
    That stress will lower if circumstances change
    Aside from being in extreme life threatening situations, stressed people tend to be stressed where ever they are and people with reservoirs of calm tend to keep a lid on things wherever they are. People have coping mechanisms or they don't Thus don't take someones open and public expressions of stress as an indication of anything other than that person needs better coping mechanisms
  9. 9.
    That anyone remembers that embarrassing thing you did
    People have busy lives. And what time they have for thinking is almost entirely devoted to thinking about themselves. If they are thinking about you it's only to wonder what you're thinking about them. So thAt flubbed presentation, the horribly mangeled phone call, your zipper down all day - relax. Everyone forgot it while it was happening.
  10. 10.
    That people know what they are talking about
    Common misperception! Almost never the case except when they are talking about their immediate trade. And even then maybe not.
  11. 11.
    Bonus: The Secret of Happiness in 4 parts;
    1. Cut out all the things above. 2. Accomplish things you feel proud of 3. Surround yourself with good people. 4. Look for ways to help