Observations when you take your kid to the suburban ER.

9y.o. dropped a weighted bar on her big toe.
  1. There's valet parking. WTF?! I didn't use it bc I didn't have cash for a tip.
  2. If your kids arrive in their pajamas you jump to the front of the line.
  3. There is no frequent customer punch card, but they do have all your information in the system.
  4. There are no hot doctors or nurses like George Clooney or the people on Chicago Med.
  5. When your healthy child is with you, she will pick up a super virus, a hacking cough and the Zika virus just by sitting in the waiting room.
  6. When you have wrapped the injury in haste, the triage nurse will look at you like you are a hack of a mother.
  7. When your 9 year old is a nervous talker with a high IQ, she will explain to all the nurses and doctors why they are doing every single procedure. Smart ones are amused, dumb ones are threatened.
  8. A broken toe, removed nail, 6 shots and 9 stitches is a pretty sucky way to kick off summer 2016.