Signs That I'm Hurtling Into Middle Age
- •I don't get Snapchat.Ditto Tumblr.
- •The students on my university campus don't mistake me for one of them anymore.No more invitations to parties thrown by student orgs.
- •The other kids at my kids' preschool occasionally mistake me for the grandmother.Little jerks.
- •I sometimes feel compelled to tell people, "When I was a kid, they dropped us off at Six Flags at opening and picked us up at closing, and we all survived!"So get off my lawn, you little whippersnapper.
- •Kids I babysat are having kids of their own.I did not approve this!
- •I extol the virtues of responsible retirement savings and long-term disability insurance to the young people I manage."After you max out your Roth IRA..." "Zzzzzzz"
- •I imagine that the nineties were six or seven years ago.
- •But in my mind's eye, I'm 24